Hartford Courant from Hartford, Connecticut • Page 47

CONNECTICUT SiffJ, SECTION WEDNESDAY SEPTEMBER 28,1994 Divorce cases shouldn't have By FRANK RIZZO Courant Staff Writer esbians are the hot new cover girls of Newsweek, Vanity Fair and New York magazines. As lesbian artists take the spotlight, awareness enters a anylosers Barbara T. "IsV Roessner Lesbian comedians such as Kate Clinton, Lea DeLaria and Suzanne Westenhoefer are finding wider audiences on this weekend. The works range from serious explorations of gender to girls who just want to have fun. Besides Hughes' latest appearance in Connecticut (she performed at Real Art Ways several years ago), transsexual lesbian Kate Bornstein will read from her new book "Gender Outlaw" Thursday at Real Art Ways' performance space on Arbor Street.

And on Friday and Saturday at the Hutensky Theatre in downtown Hartford, Cowboy Girl and poet Juliana Luecking will also perform for Real Art Ways. Westenhoefer and jazz singer Suede will perform Saturday at Lyman Center, on the campus of Southern Connecticut State University in New Haven. "Visibility is the dyke mantra du jour," Hughes wrote recently in an article on lesbian comedians for New York's Village Voice. The lesbian phenomenon has even become a topic for those very same comedians. "There are so many lesbian comics out there," jokes Clinton in her stand-up act, "that I'm thinking of getting a guitar or a boyfriend." "But the new visibility is designed in terms of celebrity," cautions Please see Lesbian, Page E6 41 HBO.

And lesbian authors have transformed a cottage publishing industry into a duplex of dollars. Vogue says lesbians have taken over the pop culture so quickly that they may become "the Hula Hoops of the '90s." "It's sometimes as if producers and promoters have discovered lesbians, like Columbus," says writer-performer Holly Hughes, whose new one-person Obie Award-winning theater work will be presented at Yale's University -Theatre in New Haven on Saturday. Hughes joins several other lesbian writers, performers, poets and comedians who are, coincidentally, presenting their work in the area It's the quintessential child-custody battle of the '90s, the bid story with a distinctly modem twist. A high-powered U.S. Senate akje loses the children to the stay-jtf-home nurturer and gets slapped with a massive monthly support br-der to boot.

Only this time, the careerist is called Mom; the the checks, are being handed ever to doting Dad. The outcome of this latest high-profile custody fight, in whidvtae judge's decision was based at Ifajt in part on the mother's excessive office hours, has women's group's fuming at yet another- assault fn lllustration by KERRY GAVIN Special to The Courant Impossible love: t. a duck and a dead guy What man touches now the Bride of Summer's tapered fingers? Whose kisses bring a blush of rhubarb to her sun-dabbed cheek? Who sees her face, lush and love-weary in sleep? I would be that man, I Would sink in her hair like a bee in wildlowers. from "The Bride of Summer" by Ammi Cathcart (191 1) wormng motners. Their anger is justified too narrowly focused.

Fpr -lire ock," said a Plumed Duck of Cairo. Megan Cooper sighed. The duck I'M was right outside her office, waiting for her. It had been there tor days. "Mock," it said again in the wan, dispiriting baritone of all PDCs.

If Megan ventured outside, the duck would, she knew, follow her. Occasionally it had even bent low to tap its bill three times on her foot. Aster Synge had been heard telling her tour groups that the duck had "conceived a passion for the Memorial's director, Miss Cooper." A duck and a dead guy, Megan told herself. You're really rolling sevens these days. "Mock.11 1 It seemed an apt commentary nn hpr rnrrpnt nr.

-The Resurrection of a novel by colin McEnroe the annual Aeneas Cathcart Cathcart, who struck Megan as possibly the worst American poet of the early 20th century, had been an especially treasured house Eet in the great ome of Geoffrey judge's decision is a direct attack on all working parents. Men well know the wounds such attacks can inflict; forbears, they're been systematically flogged by thjs very same bias. The courts, by automatically consigning men to bread-winning role, hgve routinely ignored their value as nur-turers. The assumptions have ben sweeping and devastating: She has the love; he has the cash. Predictably, fathers' rights groups are gloating that the tables nave finally been turned.

They shouldn't be gloating, though. They ought to be empathizing. And now that both sides are feeling the sting of the courts' outmoded views, they ought to be joining in a full-scale campaign to bring the custody process into the post-Kramer vs. Kramer world. It's time for the courts to listerrup: Most mothers work outside home.

Many, many fathers are ac- tively engaged in the day-to-day raising of their children. And, most important of all, the children of divorce need and deserve a full and fulfilling relationship with both their parents. The Washington, D.C., case is, in fact, a powerful argument for joint custody -I- a continuation of co-parent roles among parents who are no longer married, a sharing of financial, emotional and physical responsibility for their mutual offsprings Why, when faced with two lovujg parents, should the courts insistlon designating a winner and Why, when children lose their parents' marriage, must they also parent? Why does the legal system persist in applying a standard thatls unjust and unfair, regardless of the victim's gender? Much has been written in recent days about the reigning confusion over how best tip determine which parent is the fitter, now that the traditional mother-gets-the-kids, father-gets-the-bills model is becoming obsolete. Is the better parent the one whp makes more money? Is it the one who cooks the more nutritious dinners? Is it the one who spends more time at home, or the happiest time? No matter which of these standards the courts may choose, the inevitable effect is that divorced parents are compelled to tear down each other in court. Each must prove the other bad.

The inevitable effect is more rancor, more bitter-, ness and less chance of the children's having a full-fledged, fully involved mother and father. I Holly Hugh' shows play with traditional female imagery. So her little mermaid Is blond, beautiful and gagged, fitting for a woman who had her National Endowment for the Arts funds rescinded and then restored. Exploring the explosive power of language and Iphigenia and one of their rare departures from inerrant good taste. Forever declaiming in their parlors and dining at their table, Cathcart was inescapable and must have driven some of the cannier members of the Hatcher coterie half mad.

Iphigenia's will had left a large sum of money for the celebration of Cathcart's imperishable memory, and Megan wondered if this could be evidence of a hitherto undetected sense of humor. Each year the symposium gathered under the Memorial's gables a gaggle of sullen scholars who had forced upon themselves an interest, if not an enthusiasm, for Cathcart, mainly because the prize money for the best critical essay was so hefty And given that there was so breathtakingly little to say about Aeneas Cathcart, the odds of winning always seemed sporting, even to scholars of a very uninspired stripe. Out the window, Megan could see Guinevere Hatcher alight from a deep purple Lexus and make her way up the walk, heading straight for the archives. The PDC shot her a glance and Please see In love, Page E3 By OWEN McNALLY Courant Staff Writer inority groups have to de velop economic and political muscle to break the racist, sexist and homo iM Gregory WJHjUIMIHUI WW is journalists and academics who will participate Saturday in Hartford at the Mark Twain House's 1994 Fall Twain Symposium on "The Power of Language." Writer Gloria Naylor, whose stage adaptation of "Bailey's Cafe" had its premiere at the Hartford Stage in 1994, and Frank Rich, a New York Times columnist and former chief drama critic, will deliver keynote addresses. Other partici- pants include: Jeff Greenfield, ABC news commentator; Clarence Page, Pulitzer Prize-winning Chicago Tribune columnist; Shelley Fisher Fishkin, professor of American Studies at the University of Texas and author of "Was Huck Black? Mark Twain and African-American Andrea Ford, Pulitzer Prize-winning reporter for the Los Angeles Times; Roger Abrahams, professor of folklore and folklife at the University of Pennsylvania; James Bernard, editor of The Source, a rap magazine; Jocelyn Chadwick-Joshua, professor of English at the University of North Texas; Michael Eric Dyson, professor of Afro-American studies at Brown University and author of "Reflecting Black: African-American Cultural Please see What evil, Page E2 phobic words and stereotypes that shackle them in the English language, comedian Dick Gregory says.

Christopher Hitchens, author, columnist for The Nation and contributing editor to Vanity Fair, fears that the debate over political correctness, or PC as it's called, has degenerated into "a dialogue of the deaf," and is skeptical about whether linguistic evils can be legislated out of existence. Gregory, a civil rights activist and author, and Hitchens, Washington editor for Harper's magazine and book critic at New York's Newsday, are among 13 prominent writers, Interactive 'Caleb' The Resurrection of Caleb Quine" is a work In progress. You read the novel as Colin McEnroe writes It. How's he doing? Call Courant Sonet, 24-1000. Enter Source No.

3654 and press 0 to tell Colin what you think and suggest plot developments. Help Colin pull off a literary coup on deadline. Hitchens "iZm isllll Almanac E4 Ann Landers E4 Crossword E5 Games E3 Horoscope E4 Jumble ES Nielsen ratings E2 Showtime EG Television E2 Word watch E2 Well then, how about threatening to grant primary custody to the parent who demonstrates the greater willingness to share control, Authority and money with the other? How about threatening to turn the kids over to the parent who is least rancorous, least self-centered, leajt proprietary, least bent on post-marital vengeance? If generosity is the standard, just watch and see how quickly warring parents lay down their weapons and make nice. And the parents' making nice is, according to every study that's ever been done on the subject, the key to making joint custody a workable alternative. There are some who contend joint custody is a good idea but that it's just too difficult in practice.

Well, as the stepparent in a joint-custody arrangement of 13 years' standing, I know that it can and does work. You have to swallow a lot. You have to exercise tremendous self-discipline to keep your attentionriv-eted on the only thing that really matters not your ego, not your pride, not your anger or resentrrjent or lingering grievances, but 'the kids. The kids, and only the kids: I And that, in this twisting, turning saga of divorce in the '90s, ought.to be the final chapter. Starry, stsny suction Oprah Winfrey's dress from the Emmy awards designed by Bob Mackie could be hanging In your closet, if you are the high bidder Friday night.

The' second annual "Connecticut's Starry Night" celebrity dinner, dance and auction at the Goodwin Hotel begins at 6 and runs to midnight. Last year's event raised $20,000 for the Tate George Dreamshot Foundation, a nonprofit group run by the former UConn basketball star to help Hartford area youngsters. STAFF AND WIRE REPORTS is $1 00; admission for dessert and the auction is $50; admission to the auction alone is $25. For information call 522-8283. Billicn-ddiar baby? "Jurassic Park," Steven Spielberg's big-ger-than-life film, will charge into video stores Tuesday, selling for $24.98.

The movie is now the highest grossing Just like Ricki First in the line of the Ricki Lake wannabes is Camie Wilson, whose syndicated daytime talk show begins soon. Wilson, daughter of former Beach Boy Brian Wilson, is best known as one-third of pop's Wilson Phillips. "Camie," to feature celeb interviews plus those popular "relationship" shows, will be taped in New York (just like Ricki). It's aimed at hip, hop and happening 18-to 34-year-olds (just like Ricki). Camie is 26 (just like never mind).

Cathy Chermol, executive producer of Jane Whitney's "Jane Whitney Show" (R.I.P.), will call the "Camie" shots. Producer is Telepictures-Warner Bros. Former "Cosby" kid Tempest Bledsoe and Melissa Rivers are also reportedly in line for talk shows. -I i film of all time. Video sales may make "Jurassic" a billion-dollar This year signed donations from basketball stars Michael Jordan, Larry Bird, Kevin McHale and Robert Parish baby the first film to go over nine figures worldwide.

The domestic gross is For hundreds of arts and entertainment events throughout the state, call 246-1000 or 1-C00-246-C07O Courant Source No. 1020 A touch-tone phone is required. more than $350 million. are among the goods to be auctioned. Admission to the event.